Have you ever been turned down because of your lack of ability? Have you ever dismissed a thought of doing something because you felt you are not up to the task? I have come to tell you to replace the “NO” mindset with the “NOT YET” mindset.
Let’s engage in this thought together: Imagine a young man who has been on a job hunt for about 6 months. This man had gone for 3 interviews at different organizations and they all said he didn’t have a particular job experience and a certification. He just left the 4th interview with similar feedback.
How do you think he will feel? Dejected, worthless, downcast, weary, worn down, almost hopeless, disturbed, concerned, discouraged, confused…I will leave you to fill in what you think.
There is one extra thing this young man has to settle in his mind to undo all the feelings we mentioned above and prevent it from repeating itself in the future. That extra thing is the conscious decision to shift from the “No” mindset to the “Not Yet” mindset.
“NO” vs “NOT YET” Mindset
If you have heard of the Growth mindset theory by Dr Carol Dweck who is an American psychologist and the author of the book “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success”, you will already have an idea of what I mean.
To ensure that we are on the same page, I will explain what I mean by the “No” and the “Not Yet” mindset. The “No” mindset is likened to the fixed mindset. To have a fixed mindset means to see your personal qualities as a fixed trait that cannot change. People who have a fixed mindset believe that talent is enough to lead success, they also believe that being excellent or poor at something is an inherent nature.
The “Not Yet” mindset on the other hand is likened to the growth mindset. A person who has a growth mindset believes that intelligence, skills, expertise, finesse can be developed through effort and deliberate improvement strategies.
“No” teaches you to stop and give up while “Not yet” shows you that there are possibilities ahead of you and that there is a large room for improvement to get a “Yes”.
On the journey to success, you rarely find the path that leads from a: “No” to a “Yes” The path is usually from a: “Not Yet” to a“Yes”.
How We Were Taught To Think
A practical illustration I will like to share is on the educational culture. In the days of my elementary education, I was quite good. I was oftentimes among the top 5 students in my class.
We grew up to have all the attention from our teachers and our parents because of our academic results. The attention given to us included the prizes, the privileges we had to go for competition, access to some resources, being a class captain (laughs…) to mention but a few.
We were made to see those who were not so good academically (result wise) — who held the lower positions as vagabonds, unserious people, nuisances and good for nothing who didn’t have a future.
I believe this mindset is so wrong and unfair. These thoughts have been coming to mind again and again and I seek to address it soon starting from my alma mater. I mean, we were very young in elementary school. The age range was from about 4–10 years, we wouldn’t have known so much and we all needed help. I know some of my classmates who used to do “poorly” then and are doing very well now.
I believe the educational culture should pay close attention to these students who are not doing “so well” because they are in their formative years and they need all the help they can get from their teachers rather than condemning them.
These teachers have to understand that knowledge can be transferred to some students easily than others and teachers are expected to deal with students accordingly.
Let’s paint a scenario of two seven-year-old pupils in basic 3 who both wrote exams, one of them had 85% and the other had 42%. The typical culture which is the “NO” culture will say that the pupil with the lower grade was unserious and cannot get an 85% or more while the “soon to be adopted culture” will say let’s carefully observe the reason this pupil had a low grade and ask questions like:
Did you understand the subject well enough?
Were the questions too complex?
Did you study for the exam?
What major difficulty did you have during the exam?
There are a lot of questions that could be asked, then based on the information and discovery, the teacher can help the pupil work on the area of concern.
I don’t know the category of pupils you belonged to while growing up, if you were at the top of your class, you have to change your mindset of generalizing that people who were at the base of the class are unserious and vagabonds because these people could have done way better if they were helped.
If you were at the base of the class, you have to change your mindset that there is more to you and you can do better if you get help.
How To Re-engineer Our Minds
Life isn’t about FINDING yourself, Life is about CREATING yourself — George Bernard Shaw VISION is not enough. It must be combined with VENTURE. It is not enough to STARE the steps; we must also STEP UP the stairs — Vaclav Havel I strongly believe that the state of the mind has a lot to do with our being and becoming. A better part of the outcomes in your life is a reflection of your mindset. The setting of the mind could have been based on your upbringing or some other related factors but the good thing is that you have recognized the mindset you have and you are willing to change it to serve you better.
Reengineering your mind or shifting your mind to believe the reality you desire takes a conscious effort which will later move you to a subconscious training from which you can easily produce your desired outcome. By that I mean you can consciously train yourself long enough till it works itself into your subconscious mind. I want you to deeply think of somethings you don’t have at the moment or some levels you desire but are not within your reach at the moment or something you want to get but you don’t have the ability yet.
You can then begin to say to yourself that not having it right now does not mean it is impossible. Then I need you to pick that desire up again and practically research what you need to get it and then go for it.
If you want to own a car, rather than feeling like it’s not within your reach. It’s okay if it’s not in your reach at the moment but it will be in your reach soon, so go online check the price of what you want and start strategizing on the “how”.
Has it ever happened to you that what you actually thought was so expensive and not within your reach was not as expensive as you thought? You can be a lot and more than where you are at the moment, you can step into higher versions of yourself, shift your mind from the “No” to the “Not Yet”.
I am rooting for you, you can be more.
The growth mindset is the way to go😎